Taking Over the World

Merry X-mas

2010-12-25T02:59:00.003-05:00

Happy Holidays

last night I attempted to take over the world by dressing as Santa and delevering what looked like toys (but really are robots program to kill and destory everything in there path) to all the childern in the world.

But hardly got past my own city before the morning.

I don't know how Old St. Nick does it.

Turkey day uprising

2010-11-24T12:33:00.001-05:00

We'll my recent plans of taking over the world have gone up in smoke again. I figured with Thinksgiving coming up there will be a lot of angry and fearful Turkeys ready to fight for their lives. So I flew to where I thought I could find a lot of turkeys looked at a globe and figured Turkey.

When I got there I was chocked I found this country has an army. Great I thought then I wont have train them. I was shocked to learn that the army was full of people and not one turkey in sight. When I asked about this the general I was talking to wasn't amused and took great offense to my statement. It seems that I made a mistake that a lot of people make and the Turks aren't to happy with that fact.

But they do find it funny to have people that make this mistake spend a night in a Turkish jail.

Thanksgiving plans of world conquest

2010-11-20T11:44:00.000-05:00

I'm making plans to travel to another country this thanksgiving. sadly my Doom Jet is in the shop so I will have to fly commerical.

looking at the prices they charge for everything I am making a not to punish the head of airline companies once I am their ruler. I'm putting a fee for every little thing they do.

Happy Veterans day

2010-11-11T16:49:00.002-05:00

I would like to wish everyone a happy veterans day.

I know in my quest to be the ruler of the world I have clashed with many of the worlds military but I would like you all know that even though that even thought we have battled many times I still have the most upright respect for all of you.

and when I do take over the world I am offering you all the chance to join my army and protect and serve me

GM gets a new boss, new focus and a new name

2009-03-30T14:53:00.002-04:00

Ah my hard long work to get my humanoid genetically modified sea monkey into the white house is paying off once again.

With the firing of GM's ceo Rick Wagoner I am now posed to take over the company.

now if you are wondering why I would want to take over a company that is in such bad shape as the American auto industry, the answer is simple. I needed a manufacturing base. As a super evil genius I can easily come up with great devices to cause destruction but I don't have the time to make these products on a massive scale.

But the big American car industry does and even better yet because of this economy, people are in so much need of a job that they wont care that they are making the devices of their doom since they will be happy just to have a job.

as you can guess once I take over GM there will be some big changes. First of all their factories will no longer make cars, instead they will now produce mechas. With the change of focus the company will go through a name change of shorts. most people wont notice it because the company will still keep the name GM, but those letters will no longer stand for General Motors, they now will mean General Mechas.

I decided to keep the name GM the same because those who have enjoyed the brand over the years will not feel alienated and yet we can expanded to reach those who may be turned of by the term motors. That and syfy was just taken by some media company.

August is a very month for me right now but all is going well with my plans for Obama and Michael Phelps

2008-08-18T03:17:00.001-04:00

wow for the most part my plan has gone really well.

my secret agent Obama sea-monkey was well received around the world, when it did it world tour.

now I am getting ready for the convention in Denver.

right now I am working on replacing every police officer in the city with a sea-monkey clone. I'm almost done but it took a little longer then I thought, because I had to spend time in China to make sure my sea-monkey/human hybrid Michael Phelps was going to work fine.

he was doing fine but my Phelps project just wasn't doning as well as I hoped. I mean Milorad Cavic almost beat him in

double teaming against my plan

2008-05-05T13:05:00.002-04:00

my plan was going perfectly until recently.

what I need to know is how did Hilary Clintion and Rev Wright found out about my plan of using Obama to be the ruler of the world.

and when did they decide to team up to fight me.

they wont beat me you hear.

Obamania wont be the only thing taking over the world

2008-02-05T12:31:00.000-05:00

I know you haven’t heard from me for sometime but that is for a very good reason. For the last year or so I have been putting things in place to rig the election of the most powerful nation in the world.

I have spent years grooming the perfect agent to take the office of President of the United States of America. I have made a person that is handsome enough to woo the ladies but not so good looking that he makes the guy feel uncomfortable. I have also giving this artificial human being the perfect back story that well touch upon the heart strings of most American, something that goes to the core of many of the ideals we hold (or say we hold) in this country.

That’s Barak Obama is part of my plan to take over the world and if he wins most of the elections to day, you may call me high-ruler.

Because if everything goes as planned next January when Obama takes office he will rip of his mask and reveal that he is a 6 ft Sea Monkey. And via this proxy I will have control of both the most powerful army in the world but also one of the most powerful media industry.

With those two things in my hand the rest of the world should fall very easily. I mean has powerful as America’s army is we will whip out any other army that stands in our way and I am sure there is no way a rage tag group of guerrilla fighters will give us any trouble.

So remember kids go out and vote and vote Obama or else.

cities targeted

2005-06-21T18:16:00.000-04:00

All right I just checked out all the locations that people saw the dead bodies of my Sea Monkeys Warriors form my last plan to take over the world.

I figure that these would be could targets because I am sure I could get people to think that these are some type of hot spots for an alien invasion.

Yeah I got the deat rays!!!

2005-06-21T18:15:00.000-04:00

Just finished the modifying my UFO’s to shot out electric bolts. I was easy to do I just through in one of those Tazer guns.

I took the UFO out for a test drive. The weapon works (I accidentally set a tree on fire). The only problem is that once I use the electric zap/death ray the battery drains out and crashes. But in the long run that really isn’t a problem since I the UFO’s to crash in the first place so people can see the Sea Monkeys and think they are the bodies of dead aliens.

a death ray or something

2005-06-16T17:01:00.000-04:00

It just hit me that it would be cool if my remote UFO had some short of weapon.

At first I wanted to ad a laser gun but I have no ideal how I could make one that was light enough for the UFO to fly but still could do any damage. I mean I could add one of those laser pens but they do no damage.

Then it hit me, I could set the UFO to send out an electric shock. Now I know it would be enough to a lot of damage. But I figure if a person saw a UFO they would be so scared that they would all ready be on edge so anything that the UFO does will be exaggerated. So a little shock will register as being the most mind numbing pain they ever felt in their life.

testing my remote controlled UFOs

2005-06-15T13:48:00.000-04:00

Last night I took out one of my remote control UFO out for a test.

At first the test didn’t go well, the UFO crash to the ground as it had a rough start trying to get beyond two feet above the ground.

Luckily for me the crash was to bad and the UFO was easy to fix. It didn’t take me to long see why the remote controlled UFO couldn’t it past clipping a toddler in the head. It was way to heavy, I guess cramming it full with a dozen giant sea monkeys was a bit much. So I took out all but three of them out and the ship flew just fine.

I'm back.

2005-06-14T19:03:00.000-04:00

Sorry for the fact that I haven't posted here for some time. But the expenses of making remote controls UFO big enough to look real and house my giant sea monkeys and still fly cost a lot more then I thought and I had cut corners (ie not pay my broadband bill) to have enough cash to build them.

everything is pretty much done, now. I should be able to test to see if these bad boys will fly.

2005-05-11T13:22:00.000-04:00

Whoa I didn't right that entry on Saturday! What the hell's going on? Did someone hack my blog?

I've being working on a way to benefit form my seamonkey/alien scare. It seems to being dieing down so I sent some doctored photos of a spaceship to the press in hopes of rekindling the flame of everyone's hysteria.

I have been working on some life size remote control UFOs and bought few packages of seamonkeys.

2005-05-07T13:44:00.000-04:00

Hi I just got into Massachusetts for the convention. I'll tell everyone about it later on. I know I'm going to meet some cool people because I ran into them early and they said that we had a great time we had.

I know I shouldn't be writing here (or should I say THIS time)but I just wanted to let everyone know that it all worked.

This will all make more since to everyone (including myself) in the near future.

The alien hunting battle suit

2005-05-06T13:37:00.000-04:00

This is a picture of the billionaire business man Lex Luther, showing of his new alien eliminating battle suit at yet another press interview. Don't ask me why it was in such a dark room

damn this guy is putting a big kink in my plan. I was going to just run around in an alien mask, scaring more people. But if some nut in a superpowered suit set on killing aliens I think may have to change my plans abit. At least something safer (for me).

Big business goes alien hunting

2005-05-05T13:42:00.000-04:00

This alien stuff is getting out of hand. I just saw on the news a story about a billionair business man that he will spend millions on this "alien invasion"

here is a picture of the guy speaking I found on an newspapers web site.

I cannot believe that the head of such a big company such as Lexcorp could fall for something so stupid. But during his interview it is made clear that he thinks of him self as some kind of warrior against some short of super menace.

I can't belive all the scare I caused. But now that a great deal of unrest is amoung the public I must figure a way to take avantage of that so I can reach my goals.

Alien body found

2005-05-04T12:20:00.000-04:00

I was watching the news this morning and saw a big story about a big uproar that someone found an alien body.

at first I thought this was either a hoax or the ranting of a crazy guy until they showed the body of the alien on the newscast. When I noticed something familiar about the alien.

I found a picture of on a news site to show you what I'm talking about.

what to do with my fallen soliders

2005-05-03T13:55:00.000-04:00

So after my failed seamonkey attack I am left with a bunch of dead seamonkeys to deal with.

At first I was thinking about just flushing then down the toilet. But I then realized that they are way to big to do that.

Then I thought about just putting them six feet under but I am to lazy to do that much digging.

I had no ideal what to do with these damn seamonkeys, and they where starting to stink.

That was until I was working in the backyard and notice that huge missile launcher I made last Christmas. I forgot all about it.

I don't know how I forgot about it, it's huge.

so last night I loaded the seamonkeys in to launcher and started shooting them every which way.

Dead seamonkey problem...solved.

The battle ends

2005-04-30T17:38:00.000-04:00

I guess I should fill everyone in on how my attack went.

everything was going according to plan at first and then my seamonkeys started gasping for air/water. It seems that they where drowning in air. Mostly all of them died due to not being able to breathe.

I think a few may have managed to make it nice bodies of salt water.

Now I stuck with a bunch of dead giant sized seamonkey bodies. I don't think I can flush these guys down any toilet.

attack of the seamonkeys

2005-04-29T15:52:00.000-04:00

All right early today I sent my plan of world domination into attacking by releasing my seamonkey warriors. Now they may not have been as ready as I want them to be but really what young drafted soldier truly is 100% ready for war?

here are a few pictures I took of the event.

Ha ha this old pasty English business man can not stand the might of seamonkey kung fu!

As covered by CNBC there was mayhem at wall street as seamonkeys rain down form the sky. Killing everyone in sight.

Surprisingly the Dow was up 1.24 points today.

my seamonkey's work quick. Europe is now under martial law.

2005-04-28T17:16:00.000-04:00

Giving that seamonkeys only live for a few months I think it's time they whent into battle now. That way I get to use them for what I payed for.

with that in mind I went to get the weapons they will need to wage war. Being on a budget I dropped by walmart and got a crap load of uzis and rocket launchers at their every day low price.

true love

2005-04-26T16:43:00.000-04:00

I'm always so happy when two people find true love.

sea monkey feed

2005-04-26T15:21:00.000-04:00

Damn the cost of feeding gaint sea monkeys can get expensive. I have by pounds of this powder stuff they eat every week.

What is that stuff anyways? I think it must be threaded sun dried sea bananas.

an army in waiting

2005-04-25T20:02:00.000-04:00

After the gaint baby thing I new I was on to something. I could use the same formula to make more gaint sized monsters.

due to my lack of funds what ever I used to turned into giant b-movie monster must be cheap to buy. They also must be smart and easy to teach.

I was wrecking my brians over this for about a month until one day when I was reading an old comic I say an ad and it hit me...

That right sea monkeys. come on it genius, they are cheap as hell and you get a lot of them. Not only that they are super smart, just look at the ads they can build under water kingdoms. AMAZING!

so far it everything has been working great. I placed a package of sea monkey crystals into vats of my formula and in days they started growing.

at first I was sad because it only looked like a bunch of dots but in about a week they were size of a human baby.

today they are 5'10 and over the last few months I have been training these sea monkeys to be the ulimate warriors. I have thought them many styles of martial arts and how to be great marksmen.

soon my little army will be ready to over take the streets and of the worlds armies that will try and stop us.

welcome

2005-04-25T16:10:00.000-04:00

Hi welcome to my blog.

I have started writing about my attempts at ruling the world at my website taking-over-the-world.0catch.com but I thought I should move my journal here at Blogger. for the easier format.

for the new people I will repost everything that was in my old site.

the old stuff:

Journal To World Domination

I have decided to write down my attempts of ruling the world.

Since at the moment I don’t have the money for all the cool things like an army of henchmen, cool weapons, giant monsters, world destroying UFOs, and other villainous things. This blog will be about me practicing the skills I will need when I get to a point of trying to take over the world and a few low budget things I’m doing to try and be your global monarch.

Jan 25

I've been messing around with an old chemistry for the last few weeks. I'm looking for a why to cause rapid gene mutations.

I was lucky enough to be able and drop something into a pregnet women in brazil food. a few weeks ago.

Jan 06 2005

All my attempts of getting plutonium have fallen by the way side with out the need money to pay the Russian mob. Which stop my plans for ringing in the new year. So in the mean time I have been using my videogame missile launcher to shoot out that WMCA Elmo dolls.

On my first test I accidentally sent an Elmo missile into my neighbors house. I ended up killing his 90 year old grandfather. Having a Muppet signing a remix of the village people’s song shoot up your arse is defiantly not the way to go out.

I’ve been firing toys at a number of sites all day. Military bases, satellites, city halls and palaces mostly. Form what I can gather I have only caused minimal damage but I have also caused a great deal of confusion. Which may leave an opening to over turn a government or two.

DEC 30

Ok I rigged all the X-boxes, PS2s and Gamecubes that I got this X-mas into a big computer matrix. With a few hacks to the systems software and few added pieces I have turned these games systems into a missile launching and targeting system. I have set so when the missiles are calculated to hit their targets the controllers will vibrate. Now if I can only get my hands on some plutonium.

Dec 28 2004

None of my items have sold on ebay yet. But there still plenty of time.

On the news they are covering my crime spree. The news is saying that what I did was an attack of terrorism because it has been reported that a bearded man in a strange hat was seen breaking into peoples homes. So now homeland security is saying this was an attack by Al-Quada because they hate are freedom and holiday merriment.

I just remembered that I while back I heard that the xbox has the same amount of computer processing power as NASA had when they first sent a man into space and many nuclear missile launchers. So I’m trying to figure a way to use all these X-boxes that I have laying around to make a super weapon.

Dec 26 04

ok really early this Christmas morning I started breaking in peoples homes and stilling kids Christmas presents. I took everything, toys, stockings, decorations and even Christmas trees. I ganked it all. I wore a Santa suit just in case any of the kids woke up early and tried to peak at their presents.

Luckily I didn’t run into too many kids, just a little girl. When little Mary-sue asked me “Santa what are you doing?” I replied “I…uh…I’m…er…”

I couldn’t think of anything to say to this sweet little girl. Here eyes where so big and full of wonderment that I began to feel a deep shame about what I was doing. So I put down the bags, looked her in the eyes and said “I’m…I’m just stealing Christmas you little brat!” I then rammed her up the chimney, grabbed the bags and got out of there.

I figure I can get a nice chunk of change if I sell this crap on ebay

Dec 24 04

I practiced my villainous laugh in the mirror for three hours today. People don’t know how hard it is to get a evil chuckle down just right. You have to get a nice deep breath making sure you inhale a large amount of air and then releasing this air form your diaphragm in a long load laugh. Personal sides note I have found that best dark haunting giggles come when you also place your hands on the sides of your hips.

While watching a movie last night I came up with a great plan to get funding for my dream job as world dictator. I’ll talk about it after Christmas.